Bracing for the storm

A problem like Maria

2005-09-04T17:52:00.000-05:00

I think there has been enough put out there about Katrina and its aftermath and the insufficient response from all governments -- federal down to local -- so I'm not going to get into that. Or the political and racial implications. Because honestly, that talk just makes me sad.

And then there's ...

MIAMI — The fifth hurricane of an already deadly season developed in the open Atlantic on Sunday, growing stronger as it moved over warm water but on a course expected to keep it away from land.

I think we've had enough of these.

Hitting the fan

2005-08-28T19:45:00.000-05:00

I'm a jaded Florida resident now -- a survivor of three hurricanes -- so I haven't gotten excited as the Atlantic season has worked its way through 10 storm names (Arlene, Bret, Cindy, Dennis, Emily, Franklin, Gert, Harvey, Irene and Jose). Some were only tropical storms; others made it to hurricane status. But none affected me, so it was hard to summon any interest. Unless, of course, the storm was one that I picked in the office hurricane pool.

But I had brunch this morning for a co-worker's birthday and two Louisiana residents (guests of Erin) joined us. Katrina is creating refugees.

And then I got to work, and I was handed an NOAA report that begins:

... DEVASTATING DAMAGE EXPECTED ...

And it goes on to say:

"Power outages will last for weeks ... as most power poles will be down and transformers destroyed. Water shortages will make human suffering incredible by modern standards."

Maureen said Fontaine&Liz&family have evacuated, which is good, because that means they're safe. But the fact that they had to evacuate means what they left behind might be destroyed.

Isn't it interesting that hurricanes are all fun and games until someone I know has the potential to lose everything?

Logger acrobatics

2005-07-07T23:08:00.000-05:00

Tom's covering the Great Outdoor Games this weekend. You know: sporting dogs, ATV riding, timber events, target sports.

When I told Tom about Dennis' intensification, he said, "I know ... I'm going to be dodging projectile timber."

But really, isn't that what covering "log rolling" and "boom run" is all about? My favorite is "hot saw": Competitors use modified chain saws, most of them made from motorcycle or snowmobile engines that run on high-octane gas, jet fuel or alcohol. In head-to-head competition, each competitor will begin with the saw in the "off" position and at the call of "GO," both competitors will start their saws and make three consecutive full cuts through a 20" log, all within 7" of the end of the log in a down/up/down sequence.

Jet fuel? JET FUEL? I think there will be projectile timber -- Dennis or no Dennis.

This just in

2005-07-07T22:42:00.000-05:00

Dennis is a Cat 4. And the cone of death (weather folk call it the "potential track area," but we journalists are all about drama) has shifted to the east. That means there's still a chance Tom's beloved barbecue grill could get carried away this weekend.

Moving on up

2005-07-07T19:08:00.000-05:00

So Dennis is 1 mph from being a Cat 4.

Let's recap Category 4 storms for everyone:
Winds from 131 to 155 mph, storm surge 13-18 feet, damage extreme.

The bubble around the projected path just barely reaches the western coast of Florida, though. Pensacola gets slammed, again.

If this interferes with my plans to watch space shuttle Discovery's launch next week, I'll get hostile.

I'm a winner

2005-07-07T16:14:00.000-05:00

MIAMI -- After picking up strength over the warm waters of the Caribbean, Tropical Storm Dennis became Hurricane Dennis Wednesday evening, the first hurricane of the Atlantic storm season.

I picked Dennis in the hurricane pool. Sweet!

Don't be silly. Hurricanes are not about death and destruction. They are about me winning the office pool into which I threw $5, thankyouverymuch.

Arlene advances

2005-06-10T22:11:00.000-05:00

"WE LOVE HYPE!!! Screw substance."
-- TV reporter P.R.T. re: Arlene, which is expected to skip Central Florida but is still getting tons of coverage on the local stations

So Arlene isn't coming anywhere near me in Orlando. Good news. Pensacola is going to take a hit, and they're still recovering from Ivan. Bad news.

I was up early enough this morning -- 8:30! -- to hear obnoxious radio shows in my car. One was giving away prizes every 15 minutes for two hours, or something like that. Not concert tickets or CDs, but generators. Yes, generators. Given away. On a morning radio show. I guess they cost at least $500, which makes them quite valuable. I should have called in to win one, and then kept it in the box until the next big storm, when I could price-gouge one of my neighbors.

Hurricanes bring out the best in everyone.

I escaped

2005-05-31T22:03:00.000-05:00

There's a tornado watch blanketing Central Florida right now -- except Brevard County. Guess where I am.

That's right. Visiting everyone's favorite TV reporter in Melbourne.

Ha ha! (in Sean Connery Celebrity Jeopardy! voice)

Overheard in the newsroom

2005-05-30T21:13:00.000-05:00

Amid claps of thunder that can be heard even in this bunker of a building:

Night news editor: "We've got to keep track of this storm ... tornado in south Orange ..."

Good grief.

We're going to get slammed

2005-05-29T23:29:00.000-05:00

Things conspiring against the solidity of my roof and the dryness of my floors:

1. NOAA's predicting 12-15 tropical storms, 7-9 hurricanes and 3-5 major hurricanes in the Atlantic.

2. A National Weather Service guy has noted a connection between May rains and hurricanes.
More rain in May = Weaker hurricanes and fewer hurricanes.
Less rain in May = Hold on to your hats.
Just in case you were wondering, average May rainfall is 3.55 inches. We've had 1.79.

3. Some UCF weather geniuses have calculated the percent chance that certain areas will experience hurricane-force winds (more than 74 mph). On an average year, for example, Cape Canaveral is looking at a 3.45 percent chance. This year, it's 4.93 percent. In Orlando it's usually a 4 percent chance; for the 2005 season, it's 4.9 percent. There's a 1 in 10 chance Naples will see a 'cane.

I don't like these odds.

Aaaaand we're back

2005-05-23T19:12:00.000-05:00

Florida's 2004 hurricane season ended. And so did my posts. But the 2005 season is just around the corner. June 1 is the magic day, friends.

In preparation for the beginning of everyone's favorite time of year, we've got a pool going on in the newsroom: How many hurricanes can you name?

The rules, briefly:
1. Pick five names from this year's Official Hurricane Name List.
2. The winner will be the forecaster who correctly picks the most named hurricanes during hurricane season (June 1 - Nov. 31). These hurricanes don't have to hit Florida, or even hit land. They just have to be declared hurricanes by the National Weather Service, if even for just a day.

And here's the list.
Arlene
Bret
Cindy
Dennis
Emily
Franklin
Gert
Harvey
Irene
Jose
Katrina
Lee
Maria
Nate
Ophelia
Philippe
Rita
Stan
Tammy
Vince
Wilma

Tom and I have a tentative list (Dennis, Franklin, Irene, Lee and Jose). We don't have to decide until next week, though, so I'm open to suggestions. Keep in mind that 2004 brought us:

15 named storms
9 named hurricanes
3 major hurricanes that hit Central Florida
2 hurricanes that lasted 12 days (they don't often reach double digits)
2 hurricanes that started, stopped and restarted
1 storm that was retroactively named a hurricane
1 tropical storm that formed on the final day of the season

What do you think, kids?

There is a bomb on this bus

2004-10-01T23:41:00.000-05:00

Imagine that you are just going about your business, parking your car in your driveway whenever you feel like it. Even walking on it at all hours of the day. Then, imagine a giant swirling mass of wind and rain called Jeanne passes over your home, wreaking havoc on what was once a firm, stable stretch of concrete.

And imagine that Jeanne unearths a 10-foot-long, 60-year-old bomb in your driveway. Imagine that.

It actually happened to someone in Vero Beach. The Army came in and picked up "Tiny Tim," then transported it to wherever they transport these things, buried it in an 8-foot hole and detonated it. Cool.

SPEBSQSA, to you and me

2004-09-30T21:56:00.000-05:00

The true tragedy of the hurricane season: Hurricane Charley sent a tree crashing through the home of the Orlando chapter of the Society for the Preservation and Encouragement of Barber Shop Quartet Singing in America.

Belated announcement

2004-09-27T23:10:00.000-05:00

We didn't have any storm damage. By the time Tom got home last night, we had power and cable. No flooding. No broken windows.

Of course there's always the chance that Lisa could take a turn. As one coworker said, the weather people uttered the famous last words, "Lisa is no threat to land," so that means she's coming right for us.

Vamos a la calle

2004-09-26T16:29:00.000-05:00

There's a curfew until 6 tomorrow a.m.

That means no one is supposed to be out and about.

That means Tom is not supposed to leave the Sentinel to go home, as he plans to do in the next couple of hours.

His plan: "I'll just take this newspaper with me" (pointing to today's sports section) "and show them this story: Look, I work here."

No gory details

2004-09-26T16:22:00.000-05:00

Sorry, I slept through the hurricane. I woke up at noon. And only because Tom poked me in the ribs to sweetly awaken me.

I have no cool stories to share about bowed windows and bent trees and flying debris. Sorry.

Sweet, sweet distraction

2004-09-26T02:40:00.000-05:00

We watched Bull Durham and then Old School. I forgot there was a hurricane.

But then I looked up at one of the newsroom TVs and saw a gigantic blue-and-red-and-orange mass swirling over a map of Florida on Channel 13. Sigh ...

(Note to Maureen: I keep seeing D*vid W*ters on TV. Remember when we sat with him at Island Pasta?)

Conversation, just now

2004-09-26T00:31:00.000-05:00

Tom, reading something on OrlandoSentinel.com: "They ended the Jewish holy day early."
Me: "What?"
Tom: "Yom Kippur services. They're supposed to end at sundown, but they ended at 5 to make sure people could get out."
Me: "Wow."
Tom: "I hope they like Hell."

He's alive

2004-09-25T23:01:00.000-05:00

Terp, via phone, on Channel 13. Good news.

90 mph winds, with gusts up to 110, in Brevard. Bad news.

A milk carton, if you will

2004-09-25T22:26:00.000-05:00

Anyone seen Terp? I'm back at the office, watching a Channel 13 reporter in Melbourne blow away as we watch. He said winds were being clocked at 73 mph. As with the past two hurricanes, the only way I knew Terp was alive was by seeing him live on TV in a yellow plastic suit. And he's not on TV! Anyone heard from him?

Bracing for the storm: Home edition

2004-09-25T20:57:00.000-05:00

Am at home on Amelia Street. Just watched most of The Sum of All Fears. Confirmed: Nuclear winter is scarier than Hurricane Jeanne.

Orlando is supposed to have hurricane-force winds for six to eight hours, starting at 2 a.m., so Tom and I are heading to the office at 1. We'll get to sleep on the cots again. Score.

Riiiiight now.

2004-09-25T16:36:00.000-05:00

Central Florida has ceased to care. We're done. We've had it. We know that none of us will starve and the power eventually will come back on. In two days, all the stores will be open again, and we'll be fine. We just can't get excited about this anymore. Jeanne is coming, and we give up.

One of our columnists wrote in his column for tomorrow that he went to Home Depot and opted to buy a gas barbecue grill instead of a generator. They were the same price, after all.

Sleeping location unknown

2004-09-24T23:20:00.000-05:00

We just had a copy desk briefing. Apparently Jeanne is going to start thrashing Central Florida at 8 a.m. Sunday. Then she plans to do something about the fact that no Orlando homes are flooded or without electricity. That will take her all day.

The problem: I have to work from 5 p.m. Sunday to 1 a.m. Monday.
The question: Do I spend the night here after my Saturday-night shift; or do I come into work at 8 a.m. Sunday to avoid wind gusts that could carry me away, Mary-Poppins style?
The complicating factors: Working two shifts with no shower in between sucks. I speak from (Frances) experience. However, I have recently been incapable of waking up before noon, so getting up to come to work at 8 (unheard of for copy editors) might be more than a little difficult.

Keep in mind that some of the sports guys just walked by singing a song with these lyrics:
We're all gonna die/We're all gonna die/We're all gonna die trying to get to work on Sunday

Connection?

2004-09-24T23:02:00.000-05:00

Someone told me (after a few rounds at Scruffy's) last night that the worst hurricane damage this season has been in counties that went for Bush in 2000. I'm not prepared to do a statistical analysis or anything, but I like to believe that's true. Payback ... it's a bitch.

And God gave Florida the finger

2004-09-24T23:00:00.000-05:00

When Jeanne hits, it will be the first time that four hurricanes have hit Florida in one season.

Death wish

2004-09-24T21:09:00.000-05:00

Some scientists flew into the eye of Jeanne.

Word of the day

2004-09-24T20:09:00.000-05:00

Weary.

Reminiscent of Tim Russert's white board

2004-09-24T17:40:00.000-05:00

A Weather Channel lady just stood in front of a green screen, with satellite images of Jeanne behind her, and read something off a piece of paper. Was the TelePrompTer broken? Her head was down the whole time, looking not at her television audience, but at the words that shall remain mysterious (because none of the newsroom TVs have the sound on). It was very third-grade-oral-report-esque. I wish they'd let me watch Terp's channel instead.

Pray for Terp

2004-09-24T17:25:00.000-05:00

Jeanne is heading for Fort Pierce, I heard on the radio.

I was supposed to go to Brevard early next week to host a dinner party at the palacial riverside apartment of everyone's favorite Central Florida News 13 reporter. I was also looking forward to hitting up Melbourne Beach. Alas, Jeanne crushed my dreams. Sigh ...

Storm surge

2004-09-24T17:16:00.000-05:00

So Jeanne took a turn. She's coming for us. Damn.

I wonder if our landlord is going to board up our windows. I wonder if we're going to sleep at the Sentinel again. I wonder if the hurricanes are going to stop ... ever.

Introduction

2004-09-17T21:08:00.000-05:00

Meet Jeanne and Karl.

You can call them "tropical storms," but one day they might grow up to be big hurricanes. Right now, it looks as if Jeanne and Karl are going to forgo trips to Florida in favor of staying out in the Atlantic.

Five seconds of fame: If I knew how, I'd somehow provide a link to Hilda's photo on the front of today's Sentinel. It ran on front pages in at least 25 papers across the country. Anyone see the one of the guy sitting on an orange couch in the middle of his destroyed house in Pensacola? It moved on three wires, and some papers credited it as "Associated Press." But it's Hilda's. Go Sentinel photogs.

Hurricane relief = boring blog

2004-09-13T21:29:00.000-05:00

Ivan is going out of his way to avoid Disneyworld, much like any sane Floridian. That means we in Orlando will be spared. Of course, there's always another hurricane on the horizon. The next one, yet to be given a J moniker, could take a path similar to Frances', according to the very scientific newsroom gossip I overheard.

By the way, has anyone else heard the rumor that a hurricane would submerge New Orleans? I feel like someone told me that once. I wonder if Ivan will be the man for the job.

Stay the course, 1,000 points of light

2004-09-11T19:03:00.000-05:00

Ivan is a Cat 5. Woo. Wooooohooooo.

He has to take a turn, though, to cross over Orlando the way Charley and Frances did. I'm sorry, Florida Panhandle, but I hope Ivan keeps heading straight for you. It's your turn.

Stolen ...

2004-09-10T20:13:00.000-05:00

... from a Sentinel story, which includes this anecdote about a guy waiting Friday for his plywood invoice at a lumber store in Lake County:

Although he weathered Charley and Frances without plywood on his windows, he's boarding up this time "because of the tremendous winds and rain and pressure" from his wife.

Wishing upon a comma splice

2004-09-09T22:42:00.000-05:00

For once in my life, I want to look up at a newsroom TV and not see a meteorologist standing next to a gigantic orange-and-white swirl that's gliding toward Central Florida. Just once.

We're effed

2004-09-09T20:24:00.000-05:00

One of the news editors just announced to the newsroom that he has cable again at his house. This is cool for him because his cable went out during Hurricane ... Charley.

27 days. No cable.

I wonder if Tom and I will get it installed before Thanksgiving ...

Listening in

2004-09-09T18:46:00.000-05:00

I heard the tail-end of a conversation between cubicle-section-mates Bob and Maryanna that went something like this:

Maryanna: "So I'm thinking it's going to be in the next couple of weeks or so."
Bob: "Oh, really?"
Maryanna: "Yeah, there was a big earthquake over in Japan, and that's the way these things go, so a big one is coming in the next two weeks."

Here's where I interrupt.

Me: "What? So we're going to have an earthquake now?"
Maryanna, amid the laughter of Bob and Mayerline: "No, in San Francisco or the Middle East. There's usually one on the other side of the world after they have a big one in East Asia."

Apparently I only have to worry about hurricanes, for now ...

A low point

2004-09-09T16:53:00.000-05:00

The cable company/Terp's employer is using hurricanes Charley and Frances (and Ivan, why not?) as an excuse to not show up, ever, to give us the Siamese-twin gifts of cable and Internet. They've missed two appointments so far, and they have no plans of making another appointment in what I like to call "the near future."

This means many things. A sampling:
1. Tom can't watch the Missouri game tonight. Sad face. Readers (Maureen and Fiscus): One of you is hereby responsible for calling him with game updates.
2. Until today, when Tom discovered a way to bypass the problem, we couldn't watch DVDs because his TV requires cable to connect to the DVD player or something. So no TV, no DVDs.
3. We were bored into playing not one, but two games of Simpsons Clue. That's right. "Krusty the Clown, with the poisoned doughnut, in the nuclear power plant."

I'm in the mood for some Charley, Frances and Ivan voodoo dolls.

Pray harder!

2004-09-07T00:25:00.000-05:00

One of the TV stations here quoted emergency management people about Hurricane Ivan. They think it's heading for us, and might take a path similar to Frances'. It could get here next weekend.

Quotation of the hurricane season:
"Oh no." -- Max Mayfield, director of the hurricane center, when he first saw a satellite image of Hurricane Ivan

Let us pray

2004-09-06T22:26:00.000-05:00

Hurricane Ivan might miss us!

Prohibition

2004-09-06T20:43:00.000-05:00

The powers that be are not allowing the sale of alcohol during curfew. (Midnight to 6 a.m. in Seminole County, 9 p.m. to 6 a.m. in Orange County, I think.)

One creative bar owner kept her place open during curfew. Instead of selling alcohol, she gave it away. And patrons made donations to her business.

The best part is that she told a reporter about it, so now it's going in the newspaper. Does the fuzz go after people for things like this?

You knew it was going to happen

2004-09-06T19:22:00.000-05:00

Someone named their baby born in West Palm Beach during the hurricane ... wait for it ... Frances. How quaint.

What a nice gesture

2004-09-06T19:03:00.000-05:00

A bar owner decided to hunker down in her coastal place of business during Frances. Some National Guardsmen came to help her out, and because she couldn't reward them with beer -- their sergeant, they claimed, would not allow it -- she ordered all her waitresses to flash the men.

The quote was something along the lines of, "Well, I had to find some way to thank them."

Lucky girl

2004-09-06T18:17:00.000-05:00

I have power survivor's guilt. Many people I work with are without electricity or phone service. The power company told Maryanna that a technician would get to her house to fix her phone line on or before Sept. 22.

I feel like inviting everyone over to my tiny house in Lake Eola Heights to share the joy of A/C with me.

Debate on the newsroom floor

2004-09-06T17:20:00.000-05:00

If power company reps says power will be restored by midnight Saturday, do they mean the minute after 11:59 p.m. Friday, or do they mean 11:59 p.m. Saturday?

Dumb criminals part 2

2004-09-06T17:18:00.000-05:00

Someone broke into a restaurant in Orlando during the hurricane and jumped into a container he thought he could hide in.

Turned out it was the barrel holding leftover grease.

Ha.

Terp wouldn't have

2004-09-06T16:18:00.000-05:00

Channel 9 reporter interviews residents in Melbourne Beach, where water went so high that it deposited sand in beach-side houses, as well as on the lawns of houses across the street from the beach.

What's the most insensitive thing the reporter could (and did) say?

Voiceover: "The Sandman has definitely been here."

Freedom!

2004-09-05T18:58:00.000-05:00

And I spoke too soon. Dan is sending me home. Don't worry, Frances, I'll be back tomorrow.

In for the long haul

2004-09-05T18:40:00.000-05:00

Hurricane Frances: "Dan, I don't think the new copy editor should get Labor Day off. I mean, she was just hired two months ago. She's barely above an intern on the newsroom food chain."
Boss Dan: "I can't argue with that."
Hurricane Frances: "So I'll wreak havoc on Central Florida, necessitating her appearance at work on Monday, even though you told her she could have the day off."
Boss Dan: "I'll go ahead and send her an e-mail about it."

OK, so maybe that's not exactly how it went. I have much love for Dan. He's a great supervisor. But damn ... Frances, I shake my fist at you.

Creative use for a chainsaw

2004-09-05T18:04:00.000-05:00

Someone took a time out from dealing with hurricane debris to use a chainsaw to attempt to steal an ATM. Inventive? Yes. Smart? No. All police officers are doing right now is cruising around, looking for looters. Hence the curfew.

And to jail he went. At least he'll have power tonight.

Can I get an extension?

2004-09-05T18:00:00.000-05:00

Apparently there's a curfew in full effect. People aren't supposed to be out and about in Orlando past 6 or 7 tonight. I'm banking on the fact that the OPD will go easy on me and let me drive the seven blocks home after a 34-hour shift at the paper. There's a media exemption, right? Right?

I want to move

2004-09-05T17:12:00.000-05:00

Hurricane Ivan is on the horizon. If it hits next week, that would make it three hurricanes in a month. One of the Sentinel's columnists says we in Central Florida are in the beginning of a 25-year hurricane-heavy cycle.

FTBS.

In honor of Lutes and NickDubs

2004-09-05T17:05:00.000-05:00

I know this isn't hurricane-related, but it must be said.

There's a designer working tonight who's wearing a Canadian tuxedo. Levis and a jean jacket. Exact color match on the denim. Fantastic.

Desperation

2004-09-05T16:29:00.000-05:00

People are selling Hurricane Frances wind-in-a-jar on eBay. Any takers?

Damn

2004-09-05T16:22:00.000-05:00

Tom just went home. Our house has power and no damage.

1. Booyah.
2. I so could have gone home last night.

Great impression

2004-09-05T16:17:00.000-05:00

When I rolled out of my cot in the conference room this morning, in my pajama pants and sweatshirt and socks and messy hair, I ran into a) The Editor, aka the big boss lady, and b) the managing editor. Check. That's the two highest-ranking people in this building.

Overheard

2004-09-05T16:03:00.000-05:00

Editor 1: "The governor just ordered rationing."
Editor 2: "So, now what?"
Editor 1: "We're trying to figure out what that means."

Camp-in

2004-09-05T15:50:00.000-05:00

I have been inside the newsroom for more than 26 hours. I've been paid for eight of them. And I just found out I could have gone home 18 hours ago.

I slept on a cot and brushed my teeth in the bathroom. No shower.

Viva Hurricane Frances.